Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Posts Tagged ‘PTSD’

Control

[tweetmeme source=”luau” only_single=false http://www.URL.com]

You can’t treat it with surgery.

Or chemo.

Or a shot of penicillin.

Or Bubbie’s chicken noodle soup.

Or a week in bed.

It’s not always visible…until the inevitable meltdown.

There is no “cure”.   There are therapies and strategies to help make the world more navigable, but Brooke will always “have” autism.  Maybe someday she will test out of the diagnosis (one can dream), but she will still have the underlying architecture of a girl with autism.  Regardless, we fight to make sure she gets the support she needs so that one day, diagnosis or not, she will be a productive, happy member of the community, of society.

As a parent, as much as I (we) fight for her, there is a sense of a lack of control.  There is no easy “target”.  I can’t give her a Tums or an Advil or schedule a procedure that will take this all away from my beautiful little girl.  It’s like fighting the war on terror – you don’t know where your enemy is hiding; you don’t know when he will decide to attack; and often by the time you have marshaled your forces, he’s slipped away back into hiding.

It doesn’t help when Medicine and Education point to each other as the place you should go when they should be working hand-in-hand.

I’ve seen a lot of moms with PTSD – my own wife included.

Yes, control goes out the window.

***

One of the ways I have learned to take back some of that sense of control is through running.

Does my running help Brooke?  Well, yes and no.

My running does not benefit Brooke directly, but it is my way of taking control of something in my life – particularly when things feel out of control.  Running relieves the stress and tension, helps improve my health, and allows me to be more focused afterward.  In turn, that allows me to be more present for Brooke, and though there are no guarantees, hopefully means I will be around on this planet for a long, long time to watch over her.

I have said it before and I will say it again, running has helped save me from the abyss.  It’s restorative powers are undeniable.

***

What do you do when things seem to be spinning out of control?

Advertisements

Read Full Post »

%d bloggers like this: